Dear Little,

Look, I know it’s hard to get checked by a nurse. I get it. When your throat hurts, it hurts, and the last thing you want is a stranger swiping the back of your throat with a Qtip.

But, kiddo, you have to stop kicking nurses. In one day you are up to two strikes. One for each nurse you kicked or hit while they tried to swab your throat for strep. (One got really mad and left the room). One more and I’m pretty sure they can arrest you for assault.

I can’t do all the things I would do for a client if they are scared: Calming Cap (blinders), heavy sedation medication, and a cheese stick. However, we can talk about it, and I understand you are scared. I get it. We’ll figure it out.

Honestly, I think just having time and someone who doesn’t say, “You have to do it this way or else” would help.  And being either much younger than 7 where you are too small to truly fight back, or much older than 7 when you can understand why the swab is uncomfortable but necessary, will really help.

Without prompting you decided to do what you do best: Write a note.

I tried to make you feel better by relaying a story of my youth. When I was 14 my dad had to lay across my legs, so I wouldn’t move when the doctor had to put a Novocaine needle in the bottom of my foot through a wart. This was so he could then use nitrogen to freeze it off.

Turns out, military dad who was taught weapons at West Point didn’t lay down hard enough and the doctor ended up with a black eye from my other foot kicking him square in the eye socket.

I told you this story to demonstrate that I understood what it’s like, that it’s not fun, but we have to sometimes do uncomfortable things to be healthy.

However, what you took away is that mom is a badass and told your entire second-grade class today that Mommy Kicked a Doctor in the Face.


At least you don’t have strep. Just two strikes on your medical record and a budding career as a baby MMA fighter.